Laid back mum style
For those that want to follow fashion but are too embarrassed to look like they’ve made the effort and don’t have time to make an effort even if they did want to.
I’ve done it, I’ve sat in a sand pit and judged a fellow mum; I watched as she ran to the climbing frame that her son had just fallen off, she was running in heels. Why would you wear heels to the park? She did look great though; heels with hareem trousers and a slouchy suit jacket. But I don’t think I was the only one questioning her chosen footwear. Maybe I was: perhaps it’s just me fashion obsessing.
I buy fashion magazines, I see people on the street whose style i want to steal. I know exactly what I want to look like and what I want to wear – but i can’t. I have a one year old daughter and even if I had the time to do anything other than scrape my hair off my face , put on some make up and put together an ‘outfit’, I would get judged to fuck. For looking too good, who makes that much effort for baby music? There are rules don’t you know?
I have stuff in my wardrobe that I would love to wear for cocktails with the girls, a fancy dinner out with the husband, at that festival or on a beach in Ibiza.
Instead I wear outfits for the local playground, a rushed coffee with a friend (timed to avoid, nap time, snack time, lunch time and dinner time), baby music and soft play.
Getting the balance right can be tough; I don’t want to be that mum who makes too much effort, the one that the other ones whisper about (“why is she wearing heels in the playground?”) Very occasionally poppet will nap for me before we’re due to go out, the days chores are done and I actually have time to get myself ready for the outside world. Or I can have a poo in peace – decisions decisions.
On the other side of it I don’t particularly want trendy young things shaking their heads to themselves about the straggly woman with fromage frais in her hair and vowing that they’ll take better care of themselves when they have kids. Clothes are thrown on, usually from a pile of things waiting to be put away or dirty from the washing basket and what I find myself wearing in the Sainsburys local is not what I would call ‘an outfit’.
The first couple of months of motherhood are a blur and you’ll be forgiven for stepping out in your slippers/ odd shoes and not brushing your teeth/washing your hair. In one week my baby brain made me order the same book twice (spot the naive new mum who thought she’d have time to read a book) and purchased a tumble drier online instead of a washing machine. New mum fashion is unsurprisingly comfort first; Walking around with a muslin cloth attached to your shoulder is a must, slipper socks rock and anything other than ‘lounge wear’ or tracky bottoms is unthinkable. I can’t get away with any of the above anymore.
Practical comments and tips are always welcome below, a friend told me about the joys of layering which came in handy when poppet had reflux, a vest over another vest or a T-shirt over a long sleeved top is a look I like anyway, it’s also very handy: removing a top meant that I would a)not be wearing just my bra which could be awkward and b) not be (too) vomit stained in public. Headscarves are a nod to the 70′s revival that will also cover a bad hair day. Loving the ‘70’s look.
So, back to now – what kind of pieces are low maintenance, stylish but not too stylish and baby proof? What is the laid back mum style? Are there key pieces that can get you through a summer of playgrounds, walking on beaches, cafes, and even the odd restaurant or bar.
I reckon I can get away with a maxi dress if it’s worn with flip flops but not wedges. Long loose vests will casualise (that is not but should be a word) figure hugging flares. Boyfriend jeans make a bandeau top much more acceptable in a playground environment. Its an extension of the ‘show legs or boobs rule – but not both’; both is not classy and you may be mistaken for a lady of the night. It’s all about balance.
